A dream. A romance. A love. In Words. I think you prefer when the world "together" means not "a million," but just two.

  Poems to Louis


I was one of the insatiables. The ones you'd always find sitting closest to the screen. Why do we sit so close? Maybe it was because we wanted to receive the images first. When they were still new, still fresh. Before they cleared the hurdles of the rows behind us. Before they'd been relayed back from row to row, spectator to spectator; until worn out, secondhand, the size of a postage stamp, it returned to the projectionist's cabin. Maybe, too, the screen was really a screen. It screened us... from the world.


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Fiction or Reality?

I've always allowed myself, my life and my thoughts to be fictional.

But fiction doesn't work anymore. Fiction doesn't get me in touch with people. Fiction can not make me happy.

My life has to be more real.


Here comes reality ...
13.8.07 22:25


Confused with Life

I'm confused by everything right now.



It just feels as if everything was upside down. Right is wrong and wrong is right.

And I'm about to do something wrong, as I did before. THe decision is not only mine, but I'd agree.
And why? Because I like it and because I imagine it is exactly what I need and all I can get. All I can expect from another person.

It's kind of poor, I know.
But it's my life.
16.8.07 01:40

Harsh Encounter

It never did break her heart.
It never did break her soul.
It never did break her.

It was more like being punched.
Again and again.
First loved, then hit in the face.

So cruelly, so affectionate.
Love me, hate me.
Kiss me, kick me.

Fuck me, leave me.

It never did really bother her.
She always agreed or made the purpose.
It truely enriched her, personally.

Only made her sad sad sometimes,
to feel what she could be feeling all the time,
if they would not be gone in the morning.
16.8.07 01:49


He does not know ...
He can not tell ...
He can not imagine ...

what he is missing by rejecting ME ...
17.8.07 00:36


I am worried about him.
About them.

I hope nothing'll happen to them.

I hope he'll face it out.

Please, survive and get well.
20.8.07 00:28

Worried again

I'm worried about her.

I don't know what to do. I feel so helpless. Isn't there anything I might do? Anything that might help?

I just hope she'll be better soon ...
31.8.07 00:36

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